A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 258

Sarayubala Devi:

4 September, 1918:

Mother was telling her beads, the evening prayers were over. I had brought some food I had cooked for Radhu's husband, and Mother asked Radhu to take it to his room. When I came back and took my seat, Mother asked me how we fared. A woman - a relation (Nalini - a niece) of the Mother's came in and said to her, "Make me feel happier; I have no peace of mind, I have no desire to live, I shall leave you by will whatever I possess. You can dispose of them accordingly after I die."

Mother laughed and said, "Well, when do you intend to die, then?" Later she looked more serious and said, "Then you had better go home quietly and not make trouble in such a place as this. Even in such a place and staying near...." here Mother restrained herself and continued, "near such holy men and the Master himself, if your mind can't find peace, then tell me what do you want...Consider the life that has been given to you, no complications whatever! You could have made the best of this life. You don't realize where you are; but you will when the opportunity has slipped away, not now.

"There's evil in your mind, that's why you can't find peace. Idleness has turned your head. Must you never have a single good thought? What an impure mind is yours!"

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 257

Sarayubala Devi:

3 September, 1918:

I asked, "Well, Mother, it is said that in this life a woman's husband is her perceptor and deity. The scriptures declare that in the service of her husband a woman may find divine beatitude (sAlokya) and union with the divine (sAyujya). If a woman tries to lead a life of self-control by pleading and reasoning with her husband somewhat against his wishes, is that a sin?"

"If it is for the sake of God, then it is no sin," Mother answered. "One must control the senses; that's why so many rules and regulations were devised for widows.

"The Master was interested in nothing but God. When I asked him what I should do with the sAris, conchshell bangles, and other things with which he worshipped me when he performed Shodashi pujA, he said after a little thought, 'Well, you can give them to your own mother,' - my father was still living - 'but be careful that when making the gifts you don't look upon her as your personal mother but as the Mother of the Universe.' I did so, such was his teaching."....

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 256

Sarayubala Devi:

3 September, 1918:

"The Master spoke of nothing but God," Mother continued. "He would say to me, 'Look how worthless is the human body. Here today, gone tomorrow, and so many sorrows and troubles through life....God alone is the Eternal Truth, one's good lies in calling upon Him. The body is the source of complications.'

"The other day, Bilash (Swami Vishweshwarananda) came and said, 'We have to be so careful, Mother; we have to be always on guard, in case some evil arises even in the mind.' You understand they are like white cloth, whereas worldly people are like black cloth, on which even ink-spots do not show, but a single spot on white material catches the eye. To be in the body is a source of evil...That's why the Master used to say, 'Be careful, you who have given up the world.'...

"The Master advised people to have self-control after they had two or three children."

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 255

Sarayubala Devi:

3 September, 1918:

Sarala started to read from the KathAmrita (The Gospel of Sri Ramakrishna), from the point where Rakhal Maharaj's (Swami Brahmananda's) father arrived. As Mother listened she commented, "See, what he said to Rakhal's father, when referring to the boy, 'a chip of the old block!' Indeed, that was how he kept Rakhal's father well pleased. Whenever he called, the Master would show him around, regale him with good food and conversation, fearing lest he took Rakhal away instead of permitting him to remain with us.

"Rakhal had a step-mother. Whenever she came to Dakshineswar the Master would say to Rakhal, 'Look after her properly, take great care of her, so that she will think her son loves her dearly.'"

As the reading proceeded, we came to the story of the maid Vrinda and her luchis. Mother said, "Indeed, she was a fine one! If her share of luchis fell short she would make a scene. She would cry, 'What sort of young boys of high families are these that they eat up my share too, leaving not even a single sweetmeat!'"

"The Master was afraid in case the boys overheard her. One day he came to my room, early in the morning and said, 'See here, my dear, there's nothing left for Vrinda. Do prepare something for her or she will make a row just now....'

"As soon as Vrinda arrived, I said to her, 'Vrinda, let me prepare something for you, there's nothing left.' She answered, 'There's no need for that, just give me the materials.' So I arranged ghee, flour, potatoes, and other vegetables for her."

When the chapter was finished, Sarala-didi went to attend to Golap-Ma, who was ill.

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 254

Sarayubala Devi:

3 September, 1918:

I had been ill; feeling somewhat better, I went to see Mother after the evening prayers. She was lying down. As soon as she saw me, she said, "Well, dear, are you feeling better? Have you quite recovered? I answered, "Yes, Mother."

She inquired after my family and later said, "Sarala read from the Master's book yesterday. Such wonderful words! In those days I never thought these things would come to pass. What a man to be born upon this earth! So many people received the Truth from him. How full of joy he was! Every hour of the day was filled with laughter, words, stories, and songs. I have never known him to lose his peace of mind. He would say such wonderful words to me. Alas! If I could read and write, I too would have noted down all his words like that. Where are you Sarala? Read a little more today."

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 253

Sarayubala Devi:

August, 1918:

Round about this time I went there one evening. A SannyAsin had come to prostrate himself before Mother, and said, "Why is my mind so restless at times, Mother? Why can I not remain immersed in thoughts of you? Why do all sorts of extraneous thoughts intrude? Mother, small things may be had for the asking and so it has been, but shall I never find you? Tell me, Mother, how may I find peace, shall I never receive your grace? I don't have so many visions these days. If I don't find you, what does my life avail me? The sooner it ends, the better."

Mother replied, "What's that you say, my child? You must not think in this way. Are visions everyday things? The Master used to say, 'You may cast your line daily, but can you catch a large fish every day? If you wait intently day after day with all your paraphernalia, you may catch a fish someday, or you may not. But don't give up waiting.' Pray longer."

Jogin-Ma added, "Yes, His name is God. Even if you can't concentrate in the beginning, you will later."....

Mother said, "Cling to what you have found. Say to yourself, 'Even if I have no one else, I have a Mother.' Didn't the Master tell us before he left us that he woud appear on their last day before all who belong to him and take them along with him?"

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 252

Sarayubala Devi:

August, 1918:

Two days later Mother was telling her beads on the veranda over the lane. When I did not find her in her room, I went there. She cried, "Oh, there you are my dear, do sit down." Her prayers over, she touched her little rosary bag to her forehead and put it away. In those days there was an open plot of ground in front of Mother's house, to the west of this a number of poor tenants lived in huts with tiled roofs. She referred to them and said, "See, how they work hard all day and rest in the evening. Blessed are the poor and suffering."

I had read in the Bible that Jesus Christ had said those very words, now I heard them from her lips as well....

The rheumatism in Mother's knees was troubling her again. The two sons of a devotee were here yesterday to treat her with electric batteries. It had done her good and the young men had come again today, whereupon Mother's youngest sister-in-law declared that her rheumatism had taken a turn for the worse since last night and she would like the treatment too.

Mother laughed when she heard this and said, "Go on dears, give it to her."

The young men arranged their machines and touched aunt's feet with the battery and immediately she shrieked out, "Oh dear! I am dead! My whole body is tingling, let me go now."

When the others heard this, everybody laughed. Aunt was by no means like the long-suffering Mother....

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 251

Sarayubala Devi:

August, 1918:

....We began to talk about Jayrambati. Mother said, "Once there was a terrible famine in those parts (1871). Numbers of starving people would come to our house. We had stored away last year's excess of paddy. Father had it husked into rice and cooked with kalAi pulses to make a large pot of khichuri. He would say, 'Everybody in this house will have this, as well as anybody who comes. Only for my Sarada you must prepare a little fine rice. My darling will have that.'

"Sometimes so many people would arrive that the khichuri ran short, and more would have to be cooked. As soon as it was ready, it would be poured out, piping hot, and I would fan it to cool it, because so many famished people would be waiting. One day a woman arrived with her hair dry and wind-blown, and mad eyes. She arrived and immediately started to eat the broken rice in the cattle trough. We kept telling her that there was khichuri in the house but she could not bear to wait. Such are the pangs of hunger.

"...When I was ill in our village home this year, I felt so terribly hungry one midnight! Sarala and the others were asleep, after working hard all day, and it seemed a pity to wake them. I remained in bed and felt around me. I discovered a little dish of parched rice. There were also a couple of biscuits near my pillow. I was delighted. I ate them and took a drink of water from the pitcher beside me. I was so hungry that I had no idea what I was eating!"

Mother laughed as she related the story.

(to be continued....)

A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 250

Sarayubala Devi:

23 August, 1918:

It was raining heavily this afternoon. As the time to go to see Mother drew near, I wondered how I could manage it. It was already getting dark. At Shokaharan's advice, I wrapped his waterproof around me and set out. Gusts of rain swept over my face, and yet I cannot describe the deep joy and impulse which impelled me forward. I entered by the back door, because I felt shy in case the monks saw me like that.

When I arrived before Mother looking like that, she burst into laughter; but when my wet clothes touched her feet as I stooped to bow to her - the cloth over my head was wet - she grew worried and cried, "Why, you are quite wet! Go and change, put on this sAri of Radhu's."

I said, "Feel, Mother, I am not wet anywhere else, I do not need to change."

Mother did so and said, "Why, so it is."

(to be continued....)




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A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)

Page 249

Sarayubala Devi:

August, 1918:

Mother: "After the Master had gone and it was decided that I should come here - I was then at Karmarpukur - many people said, 'How can she go and live in the midst of so many young men!' I knew in my own heart that I was going to live here, yet I asked many people about their opinion, because one should pay heed to social opinion. Many others on the other hand said, 'Of course you must go, they are all your disciples.'

"I heard what everybody had to say. Later I went to an old lady (Prasannamayi) in our village, whose word is much respected because of her piety and wisdom, and she said, 'What? Certainly you must go. They are your disciples and like your sons. What is there to discuss? Of course you will go.'

"When the others heard this, many of them gave their consent. So I came. Do you know that for my sake they take care of even a cat from Jayrambati! My mother would grieve, 'I have married my Sarada to such a crazy husband that she can't enjoy ordinary married life or have children and hear them call her mother.'

"One day the Master heard her and said, 'Don't grieve over that, Mother, your daughter will have so many children, you will see, that her ears will ache at hearing the cry of "Mother".' He was quite right, whatever he said has come to pass."

As it was getting late, I took my leave soon afterwards....

(to be continued....)