A READING from: "In The Company of The Holy Mother"
(available at all Vedanta Centres)
19 April 1920:
This time, however, Mother's long illness had embittered her and she cried out to Radhu, "Yes, my dear, you will learn your lesson after I go. I don't know what sorrows are in store for you; but on this auspicious (new year's day) day I truly wish you could go first, then I would die in peace."
I have no desire to repeat what Radhu said when she heard this. Sarala arrived shortly afterwards and went to see to the boy's meal. All of us felt depressed.
Filled with emotion, Mother said to me, "Fan me, my child, she will not give me any peace!"
When I had fanned her for a little while, she asked me to rub her feet. Just then Rashbihari Maharaj came in and wished to draw down the mosquito curtains. At last I said, "I am leaving now, Mother."
"Yes, my dear," she assented.
These were her last orders and her last words to me.
I had returned to Kalighat and could not manage to go and see her again as everyone in the house had fallen ill.. I heard that her health was deteriorating daily. When I went for the last time I felt that there was no more hope for us; but we still hoped.
(to be continued....)